Mikhail Lermontov
I look with fear toward the future...

I look with fear toward the future,
With yearning back toward the past,
And as a criminal before execution
I search in vain for a kindred soul;
Will there be a messenger of my salvation,
Come to show me my life's purpose,
The goal of my prayers and passions?
To tell me what God has in store for me,
And why he has so bitterly crossed
The hopes of my youth?

I gave the earth her earthly dues
Of love, hopes, good, and evil;
I am ready to start life anew,
Silent I wait: the time has come.
I leave no kindred soul¹ behind me,
And embraced by cold and darkness
Is my tired spirit.
Like an early fruit, devoid of life-giving waters,
It has been engulfed in fate's storms
Under the harsh sun of the day-to-day.

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1.The literal translation is "brother", but the word can also be used to refer to a close friend (almost family member). Plus, I wanted to refer back to the first stanza.

Translated by unknown author