Ivan Krylov
The Quartet

A grinning ape, an ass of stubborn air,
A long-horned goat, a bow-legged, grizzly bear,
Met one fine day, and soon their minds were set
To end the party with a fine quartet.
They have a viola, two violins,
A 'cello too, and music up to date,
For hall, the shady turf where crowds await,
In gaping wonder, till the treat begins.
Quick flash the bows ! Each scrapes with right good will.
But all that's heard are noises, loud and shrill.
The monkey, quite put out, exclaims at last:
«One moment, pause, I pray you, not so fast.
Our concert, friends, was certain to sound queer,
Placed as we are. You, viola, come here;
While opposite the 'cello takes his place.
Then I, who of our quartet take the lead,
Will have my worthy second face to face.
Our efforts now are certain to succeed.
Charmed by our music, presently
The woods and hills will skip with glee.»

Then each one goes to his appointed seat
And strives in vain the quartet to repeat.
«Stop!» cries the ass, «come, cease this horrid din!
See, I have found the right way to proceed,
And then our concert will run smooth indeed.
Let's sit in one long line and then begin.»
Obedient to the ass, the players then
Sat in a row and started once again.
But not one player on the right note hits.
«What can be done to find the proper key?
How shall we sit ? What can the matter be?»

They shout and wrangle till they lose their wits.

Just then a nightingale came flying by
And paused, attracted by this hue and cry.
Round her they crowd, vociferous as ever,
And beg for her professional advice.
«For pity's sake, we know you are so clever,
To put us straight a moment would suffice.
We have the instruments, the music too,
But give us just one hint what we should do.»

Translated by Rosa Newmarch